Pneumatic Sex, Corn, Suffering
~ Prologue: Another Dream ~
A fellow at my work and I have been discussing the strange fact that everything we eat is made out of corn. When I say "we", I am referring to North Americans. I don't know know much about what the diet of you UK types consists of, although if the old adage you are what you eat is to be taken seriously I would guess "whimsy" and "awkwardness". This grain of folksy wisdom applied similarly to the North Americans paints a portrait of a peoples who must seem very corn-like. Our coca-cola is actually corn-sweetened water with corn-based flavoring. Our Cheese Puffs and Doritos are nothing more than puffed corn with cheese flavored corn dust all over them. Finally, our cows eat mostly corn, which they then squirt out in the form of corn-cheese and corn-milk, and ultimately end up cut into pieces and placed on a plate at the Keg as a corn-steak.
What this leads me to believe is that we truly are corn people. All of our cells, our protein strands, originate with the humble corn. I wonder if it follows that we exist on a different plane of the physical world than the people who are not on a corn diet, if only slightly. Are there fundamental differences between a corn person and, say, a yam person that make them unable to converse in any meaningful way? What about a chickpea person, could we embrace them without resentment? And what do those slippery fish people, what would they think about that if it happened?
In my dreams I see a world of man-sized corn walking to work, driving cars, attending films and cannibalizing their dead. This is not to be taken in a morbid manner, but rather as a surreal caricature that happens to be just an inch closer to the truth than what we're told is real in the newspapers.
~ Chapter 1: I Am Easily the Most Selfish Person Alive ~
Once upon a time on a different blog I wrote something important:
Call me a bad person but...
I don't want to suffer for my art, I want others to suffer for it.
Although this statement still stands, I would like to add that I don't want other to simply suffer for my art, but suffer from it as well. Candidly, I will admit that the only person ever intended to enjoy it is me. Your enjoyment is coincidental, even perhaps counter-productive.
The corn people have concentrated a vast amount of their resources on reducing their suffering. But the Russians, who are made of grains and roots, have always considered suffering a virtue. Perhaps it would be easier if I became one of them, or at least sold to them.
~ Chapter 2: Fate of the Corn People ~
The root and grain people are sure to continue until the end of all humans. Their virtuous suffering has made them very tough, and that's all it takes. I can not say with complete certainty what the rest of us are destined for, however.
Regarding the future of the corn people, one thing is certain; robots designed for sexual gratification will continue to advance under our eyes.
Female corn people will be sexually obsolete once we have a machine that smells, looks, and feels the same or better in all the manners appropriate to intercourse. These machines will be called gynoids. Male corn people have already begun to become obsolete, to some degree, by machines. However, the machines have not advanced significantly enough to replace the male corn people completely. The current male sex machines are usually called dildos, but in the future they will be called Androids.
The car of the future does not float, it fucks.
~ Chapter 3: Anthropology 203T, Gender and Sexuality ~
Last year I took an anthropology course that was supposed to be about gender and sexuality. In truth, it was mostly about gender, as sexuality was not discussed. This is because the corn people have taboos about talking about the way they were created, especially amongst the academic corn people. Perhaps they are upset that they weren't planted in the ground like their brothers and sisters, the corn which they use to eat.
Although I am partially a corn person I am not afraid to discuss sexuality. This is because I am also a creative energy person who feeds on the magic of ideas which float freely though the air.
~ Chapter 4: The Gynoids and Androids ~
I worry that either the gynoids or the androids will not be finished in development at the same time. The corn people, who are almost as selfish as I am, will not care for the feelings and sexual needs of their opposite gender once they have their gynoids or androids. So if these robots are not developed and released at exactly the same time, the results will be socially disastrous. The corn people, who avoid suffering more than any other peoples, may not be able to tolerate their sudden conditions.
~ Chapter 5: Suffering ~
Gynoids and androids are entirely different than any kind of person, be they corn or grain/root, because they don't have proteins. The extent to which their interaction with humans is meaningful for them is questionable. A movie such as Blade Runner suggests that they would not necessarily think so. However, Blade Runner also supposes that the mechanical people are capable of actual thought, which is questionable. But if they can't think, that also means that they can't suffer.
~ Chapter 6: Regarding the Future of the Gynoids and Androids ~
And what of the gynoid and adroid's fate? I have no doubt that they will outlast their creators. But what remains to be seen is if they will outlast the grain and root people. Is it better to find suffering a virtue, or be incapable of feeling it?